This week’s Sutton Guardian had a story about the use of council jargon that was excellent in every regard apart from one. I was accused of using a bit of jargon myself, when in fact, I had only used it in a previous article slamming the use of council-speak. The bit of jargon was no ordinary word. It was ‘deliverology’; a word that I believe was first used in Tony Blair’s ‘Delivery Unit’. Both of the phrases in the last sentence should be committed to trial in the lexicographical equivalent of the Hague.

Anyway, here’s my response, which I hope that the Guardian will publish next week.

“I was somewhat surprised to see that I had been singled out for criticism for the use of the word “deliverology” (Tories call for end to waffling jargonology, Guardian 26.03.09). The only time that I have used this barmy word was when slamming its use in these pages last year. I have heard it used elsewhere but still have no clue what it actually means. I would be grateful if any readers can enlighten me.

I’m always happy to take criticism on board and I am my own biggest critic, but I think on this occasion my direction of travel has been tested for soundness by my colleagues and we are coterminous in that the outcome suggests that my use of the government lexicon is a predictor of beaconicity. Either that, or to translate for the real world, anyone that knows me would think that I am pretty jargon-free.”